From: Valuemetaphysics@aol.com
Date: Thu Jul 01 2004 - 18:54:38 BST
Part I
Dear forum,
Here is an edited copy of "SQ-SQ tension in Human relationships."
Date: 3/7/04 10:34:20 PM GMT Standard Time
with some additional comments and interspersed sections by Robert Pirsig from
ricks's post.
Dear forum,
I had to laugh. Visiting a male member of my family and his wife last week
made me think about SQ-SQ tension in Human relationships...
I wonder has anyone watched, How to murder your wife starring Jack Lemmon?
There is a scene in which Lemmon's boss is being kept in a perpetual state of
uncertainty by his wife at a party. The husband and wife relationship i visited
last week displayed the same patterns and it was only until then that i had
noticed. When i did notice this, i wondered why i had not seen it before?
I think the answer to that is twofold: First of all, i am not a keen observer
of Human relationships; they do not concern me very much. Secondly, we are
very often too close to see the wood for the trees? In this respect, a bit of
distance and a bit of removed contemplation can reveal things one may never
usually have tumbled?
Back to hubby and wife; the male in the relationship is kept in a perpetual
state of not quite knowing where he stands. Not only this, but he has no idea
other people are able to see this; his dancing about the place is hidden behind
behaviour he feels projects a sense of him being in control or in some way
considerate. But no matter how accommodating he tries to be, the intelligence of
his other half deftly keeps him unbalanced. When you see it, it is hilarious.
Later on, it may not seem so funny?
Pirsig:
For the traditional Catholic layman, morality is external.
For him the other-directed authoritarian system of his moral education has
become the pattern of his life, and we see in page after page his professed
love of, and obedience to, authority. He is a system player. That is how
he had to learn it. You love the system and the system loves you. Now the
system is failing and he is without a clue and in terror as to why this
should happen.
Mark 1-7-04: My male relative's morality is being provided by his wife, a
catholic. She avoids confrontation by perpetuating uncertainty as to that which
she really wants, while aiming at what she wants by rewarding resolution of
uncertainty.
Part II follows.
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