From: Charles Roghair (ctr@pacificpartssales.com)
Date: Sun Oct 17 2004 - 20:35:58 BST
Marsha:
I know that's a complicated question, Marsha, which is why I asked it.
I suspect women can and do say what the want most of the time, but
there's some innate communication breakdown between the sexes that
garbles the message much of the time. As man and woman grow more
intimate, the breakdown of understanding accelerates.
Could it be that the language of intimacy is woefully inadequate? As
the ideas we discuss become less tangible and topics climb levels,
language sputters. Love, Faith, Quality, God: high ideas that may
shimmy off the intellectual plane and occasionally wander into pure
Dynamic Quality if only temporarily are increasingly more difficult to
describe.
Then I thought, what about the other direction?
Assume the social level is human communications home base, the most
common of the common denominators for, people, the weather (I've heard
Eskimos have over 100 words for snow, which must be an Eskimos most
common denominator with other Eskimos); the weather is where small talk
often starts. It's the most static common experience therefore the
most easily described.
Starting there, move along the levels in either direction and the same
thing happens. Describing a deep Metaphysical experience is difficult,
describing it so another person really appreciates it, really hard. I
don't pretend to be in a position to describe the behavior of
sub-atomic particles and those ramifications for reality, but I try to
understand what others who know much more about such things write and
say and while some of those explanations make sense on some level, it's
impossible to imagine.
Persons in love should understand one another well enough, yet
communication breaks down regularly and divorce is common. Tomes with
advice for couples sell like hot cakes.
Love remains a conundrum. As does God. As does DQ.
Could it be the extreme ends are too far away from the Social Level
center, too hard to see.
Maybe the levels form a circle.
Marsha, do you feel as if you've recovered your authentic voice?
Your posts ooze eloquence and Value
There's nothing ugly or gross about you from where I sit. You are the
sunshine from here.
Best regards,
Chuck
On Oct 15, 2004, at 2:10 PM, MarshaV wrote:
>
> Hi Chuck,
>
> I shared the tale of the green knight. I didn't write it. And I
> cannot speak for all women. I only have my own perspective built by
> my own experiences.
>
> You asked why women cannot just state what they want. That is a very
> complicated question. I'll speak for me only. I was not taught or
> encouraged to speak my mind, so I still find it difficult to formulate
> the words. When I was young, if I asked for what I wanted, I was
> often told I was being selfish. Or I heard some other remark stated
> to control my voice and behavior. I already told the story of how my
> husband called me illogical to stifle my debate. This culture has
> many ways of controlling woman. And they work quite well to destroy
> their authentic voice. After a while, you can't even remember what it
> is you actually do want. That can certainly turn you into something
> ugly and gross. If not overtly, than covertly.
>
>
> Sunshine
>
>
>
>
>
>
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